The King of Gee-Whiz Page 4

  "Very well," said the King. "Get the lady a gold Waffle-iron and helpher all you can with her work. If she is half as good a cook as youthink, she also may have some sort of throne; although I much regretthat her hair is far from the desirable color for those of the royalhousehold."

  "I ought to have a little flour," said the Widow, "and a little milk."

  "Milk?" said the King. "How unfortunate! The royal cows are all lost inthe woods, every one of them, and not even the Court Detective, whom Iemploy for that purpose, can find them."

  "Don't you know how to find them?" cried Zuzu eagerly.

  "No, to be sure I don't. I'm too busy to learn such things."

  "You ask a Daddy-long-legs," said Zuzu.

  "I beg pardon?" said the King. But just then, as Zuzu and Lulu happenedto grasp the Enchanted Banjo, the latter began to tell the King how tofind the cows--a thing which any child could have told him.

  DADDY-LONG-LEGS

  Ho, Mister Daddy-long-legs, it is queer How much you know. A very savage being you appear-- You are not, though. With gentle grace and kindly bows You tell us where to find the cows.

  Ho, Daddy-long-legs, tell me, tell me now Which direction I must go if I find my cow. 'Way over yonder--'way over there-- That's the way he points us with his long leg in the air.

  Ho, Mister Daddy-long-legs, when you sprawl Upon the fence, One wouldn't think the cows would moo at all When you commence To show us where their feet have made A winding pathway to the shade.

  Ho, Daddy-long-legs, tell me, tell me now Which direction I must go if I find my cow. 'Way through the meadow--'way down the brook-- See his long leg pointing out the place where we must look!

  "Well!" said the King, "that is a most extraordinary thing, mostextraordinary indeed, and I shall certainly have to call the matter tothe attention of my Court Detective. But, madam, as we have no cows atpresent, how would a little cocoanut milk do? We can get you any amountof that."

  "I have never tried it," said the Widow, "but I am sure it will be verymuch better than no milk at all."

  "Very well, then," said the King, "I'll have Jiji get you all you want."

  CHAPTER XII

  THE GOLD WAFFLE-IRON

  Meantime the Private Secretary departed, but now in a few momentsreturned with a very fine new Waffle-iron, all of gold, which he had hadmade as the Widow instructed, with small hills and hollows all over itssurface.

  "This," said the Widow Pickle, "is the most beautiful Waffle-iron I everused. If I do not make good Waffles now, it surely will be my ownfault."

  So now the Private Secretary also got her some palm flour, and twoquarts of cocoanut milk; and after making a little fire in front of thepalace door, the Widow Pickle busied herself and soon produced a nicebrown Waffle, with hills and hollows all over it, from her new goldWaffle-iron. "Now, if I only had some syrup," said she, "I am sure Icould recommend this Waffle for any purposes connected with eating."

  The King had been watching her very closely in her work. "What do youmean by syrup?" asked he curiously.

  "This," said the Widow, "is certainly a strange country--not that I wishto criticize in the least, your Majesty. But I was just thinking that aworld without syrup is very singular indeed."

  "Well, you will understand," said the King of Gee-Whiz, "we who live onthis Island are not very different from Fairies. At least, we aredependent upon the Fairies for all we eat and wear and use. They are ourwork people, and we have to take what they give us and be thankful. Now,I suppose the Fairies have never considered that syrup was necessary forus."

  Zuzu and Lulu listened with the greatest interest, and when the kingspoke of Fairies they could not restrain themselves.

  "Oh, your Majesty," said Lulu, "have you ever really seen a Fairy?"

  "Have I?" said the King. "Thousands of them. We get all our gold fromthem--when their pretty Queen, Zulena, is good enough to grant ourwishes. Fairies! Why, they are as common as leaves upon the trees. Arethere none in your country, my Princess?"

  "None," said Lulu, "only I have always so much wished to see just oneFairy."

  "If that is all you wish," said the King of Gee-Whiz, "there will not bethe least trouble about it. We got this Enchanted Banjo from theFairies, and I am sure it will be obliging enough to tell you about socommon a place as Fairy-land. Won't you, Banjo?"

  The Banjo nodded its head, and presently began to play.

  FAIRY-LAND AFAR

  I know where is Fairy-land, Little one with wond'ring eyes. Often, often, do you stand Gazing where the hills arise, Dreaming of the land that lies Somewhere, where the fairies are Past the ending of the skies-- Fairy-land afar.

  I have seen it, and I know How we journey to that land; Nodding poppies flash and glow Down the path on either hand; Jewel spray on silver sand Brings the snow-white Fairy-boats; Each, by elves and brownies manned, As a lily floats.

  Ho, sometimes you hear the bells That the dancing Fairies wear! Oft at night their music swells Far and faintly on the air, And sometimes the breezes bear Calls blown on a Fairy-horn; You have heard them, here and there, In the summer morn.

  Here's the secret: You must look For the path with drowsy eyes: Twixt the covers of a book Half the wondrous secret lies. Then if you are good and wise, In a twinkling there you are-- Past the ending of the skies, Fairy-land afar.

  "The Banjo knows more about the Fairies than any one," said the PrivateSecretary. "It can tell you how they employ themselves all these longsummer days." And thereupon the Banjo began:

  WHAT THE FAIRIES DO

  Oh, do not think the Fairies can be idle all the while, That they have nothing much to do but sit and sing and smile; Each has a task he must perform--he must be smart and good And do his work as carefully as real-sure people should.

  Some Fairies have to hurry forth and waken all the leaves And bid them come and dress the trees in dainty styles and weaves; Some Fairies have to go with paint and some with rich perfume, And tint and scent the flowers when they open into bloom.

  The Jack-o'-lantern Fairies have to dance above the bogs To make a light for all the concerts given by the frogs; And others whisper to the bees and tell them where to look For honey in a clover bloom that hides beside the brook.

  And some come when the night is here and you have gone to sleep They find your home and then upon your pillow they will creep, And tell you dreams that you must dream; and then, you understand, Next morning you may truly say you've been to Fairy-land.

  "But now, in regard to this syrup, I wonder very much how it tastes,"interrupted the King, returning to the matter that had been upon hismind, "tell me, how does it taste?"

  "Very sweet, your Majesty," said Zuzu, "and it is very nice withWaffles. I have eaten it often."

  "But whence do you obtain this syrup?" asked the King.

  "The best kind comes out of a tree," said Zuzu, who had often been withhis uncle when he was making maple sugar.

  "From a tree? Oh, I suppose you get it just as I do my palm wine when Iwish, or my cocoanut milk. You cut a hole in the tree, and catch thejuice in a cup?"

  "It is something like that, your Majesty," replied Zuzu.

  "Then, my dear," said the King, "take this little gold ax and run andcatch me a cupful of syrup for my new Waffle."

  Zuzu did as he was bid and soon came back with a cupful of very fairsyrup. This the Widow at once spread upon the hot Waffle and offered itto the King.

  "This syrup," said the King, touching his finger to the contents of thecup, "is most delicious. It is something we have had all along, but didnot know it."

  "Your Majesty," said the Widow Pickle anxiously, "I beg you will eatyour Waffle while it is hot."

  "Oh, very well," said the King wearily, "but surely you must know that Iusually
am very much more bored about eating things than any one canpossibly be who has never been a King."

  So saying, he took his royal golden knife and fork and cut off a morselfrom the Waffle, which he placed in his royal mouth. As he did so, totheir great surprise, he sat up straight, and a pleasant smile appearedupon his face. His cheek stuck out where the mouthful of Waffle lay; butthe King did not act as though he intended to swallow it, although hissmile showed that he was pleased.

  "Is it good, your Majesty?" asked the Widow Pickle again anxiously.

  The King nodded but did not speak. He motioned for a piece of paper, onwhich he wrote the word "Excellent."

  "Then, why do you not eat it?" asked the Widow.

  "I fear very much there may not be anything more so good," wrote theKing.

  At this, the Widow Pickle herself smiled happily.

  "Oh, yes, there is, your Majesty," she cried. "I warn you that everybite of this Waffle is as good as the first one. Moreover, I assure youI can bake others quite as good, as many as you like."

  Hearing this, the King at once ate the portion of Waffle, and, to thegreat joy of all, regained his voice; for of course no King ever speakswith his mouth even partly full.

  "That," said the King, with a long breath, "was the most remarkabledelicacy I ever ate in all my life. My dear madam, I am very muchpleased that I have heard of it, very much pleased, I assure you.Indeed, I welcome you to our Island."

  The King was pleased]

  "But hurry, your Majesty," cried the Widow Pickle, "or the Waffle willget cold!"

  Whereupon the King, still smiling with comfort and joy, fell to, andpresently the first Waffle was quite gone. Another followed, and yetanother. "More!" cried the King, as though he were a little boy. So theWidow Pickle, very warm and very happy, baked Waffles until she quiteforgot to count them any more.

  "You may have a throne made for the lady also, Jiji," said the Kingcarelessly to his Private Secretary, after a while, "for I haveconcluded neither to banish her nor behead her. She shall be made theRoyal Waffle Baker, with a permanent salary."

  The Widow Pickle was delighted, for although she had baked many a Wafflebefore, she had never done so with a gold Waffle-iron, and had neverbeen so well rewarded for what to her seemed a very ordinaryaccomplishment.

  Later, for the entertainment of Lulu and Zuzu, the Enchanted Banjo sangthis little song, which, it said, contained a very helpful moral lesson:

  IF YOU WERE A WAFFLE

  You think that things go wrong If you should stub your toes; If, when you run along, You fall and bump your nose;

  You sometimes wail and cry Because you may not wear The things that please your eye; You do not like your hair!

  But-- Wouldn't it be awful If you were a waffle? Puckered, brown, and round and flat-- Would you only think of that! If you were a waffle Wouldn't it be awful?

  Sometimes you sigh--you do, Because you are yourself! What would you think if you Were on a pantry shelf? If you were set away Because you had grown cold-- Left from but yesterday And now, alas! too old!

  Oh-- Wouldn't it be awful If you were a waffle? Hot and brown, and made to wait On somebody's breakfast plate-- If you were a waffle, Wouldn't it be awful?

  If you Were a Waffle]

  CHAPTER XIII

  THE FAIRY TELEPHONE

  The next morning, after the Widow Pickle and the Twins had finishedtheir breakfast, they strolled for a short time through the palacegrounds, upon the edge of which was the house which the King had giventhem as their new home. Presently, they came to the place beneath thetrees where was situated the great throne of the King of Gee-Whiz. Asthe climate was warm, he always kept his throne out of doors, under thetrees, where it was cooler than in the palace. Here they now found theKing fast asleep under his umbrella; but just as they were about tospeak to him, they saw the Private Secretary beckoning to them. Theyjoined him and followed him to a little distance from the throne.

  "We must be careful," said the Private Secretary, "not to disturb hisMajesty when he is asleep. He will probably not waken until eleventhirty-five, at which time it will be desirable for the Royal Baker ofthe Waffles to be ready to prepare his breakfast. I suggest that alittle promenade through our Island might now be found pleasant."

  "Can't mamma go with us?" asked Zuzu.

  "That would be very nice," said the Private Secretary, "except for thereasons I have given. It will perhaps be the best and safest thing foryour mamma to remain near the palace, lest the King should suddenlyawake and be hungry."

  So saying, the Private Secretary took Zuzu and Lulu each by the hand andthey started out for a walk in the cool morning air.

  Zuzu noticed that the Private Secretary carried under his arm somelittle sticks or wands, which shone as though they were made of gold andjewels.

  "What are those little sticks that you are carrying, sir?" asked he.

  "Those," said the Private Secretary, "are the Royal Wishing Wands whichhave been given to you by the King. He himself obtained them, some timeago from the Fairy Queen. You will find them very useful; for if thereis anything in the world that you want, you can have it by simplyrubbing this Wand three times and wishing clearly and distinctly. Butyou must remember that you have only three wishes in any one week; so Isuggest that you exercise care."

  As he spoke, the Private Secretary extended to each of the Twins one ofthe Royal Wishing Wands, and with great delight both began vigorously torub the Wands and to say excitedly, "I wish! I wish!"

  "Very well," said the Private Secretary, smiling. "What is it that youwish?"

  "Please bring my mamma some gold and some diamonds, a whole bushel,"said Lulu; and Zuzu said, "I wish the same, because I have often heardmamma express a wish for those very things."

  "Very well," said the Private Secretary, "she shall have them just assoon as his Majesty can telephone to the Fairy Valley. His Majesty isvery liberal in such matters as these."

  "Telephone?" cried Zuzu. "Do you have telephones here?"

  Zuzu and Lulu bowed very low _Page 50_]

  "Certainly we do. How could the King order such gold and diamonds as hemay need, if he were not able to telephone for them to the Fairies? Yousee, we get these things only through the Fairies, who live far towardthe interior of the Island, in a place which not even I myself have everseen."

  "Well, I would like to know how any one can telephone to a Fairy," saidZuzu, who had never heard of such a thing before.

  "It is the simplest thing in the world," replied the Private Secretary."The morning is the best time for the use of the Fairy Telephone. Youwill notice that then the dew lies heavy upon all the world. All theleaves and blades of grass are wet with it, and it shines in the earlysunlight, to my mind far more beautifully than any diamond. Now, overthis dewy world of leaves and grass and boughs and ferns, which toucheach other quite across the Island, you will see many little fine lines,finer than hairs, woven in and out. Sometimes you will see long floatingfilms and sometimes braided nets. These are the webs of the spiders,which spin all the time without any one asking them to work. Now, thesewebs of the spiders are the lines of the Fairy Telephone, and they runfrom this Island quite over into the valley where the Fairies live."

  "But how can you hear?" asked Lulu. "I have had spider webs in my hands,but I heard nothing at all."

  "That was because you did not have a Cricket to put to your ear at thesame time," said the Private Secretary. "If you have a good Cricket andplace it at your ear, it will say things to you. Have you not heardCrickets chirping, chirping away, hour after hour?"

  "Of course! of course!" cried both the Twins, "we have heard that."

  "Well," said the Private Secretary, "that is all there is about it. TheCrickets are simply telephoning from the Fairies to you, and it has beenyour own fault that you have not had messages from the Fairies beforenow. Only I should say you must re
member to have a White Cricket forgood Fairies. A Black Cricket will telephone only to bad Fairies. HisMajesty, of course, has a fine White Cricket, which has always livedunder his shadow; and it is with this that he telephones to the FairyValley."

  "I wish I had a Cricket," said Zuzu.

  "Very well," said the Private Secretary, "you shall have one presently;but remember that is two wishes you have already had. And remember onlya White Cricket is the right kind."

  Before Zuzu could think or wish again, Lulu broke in. "I shall wish fora dewy morning and plenty of spider webs," said she.

  "Very well," said the Private Secretary, "I shall make a note of yoursecond wish. You have now but two wishes left for the week; although Imust say that for inexperienced wishers you have done very well."

  "But why can't we ourselves go to the Fairy Valley," asked Zuzu, "if itis right here on this Island?"

  The Private Secretary frowned. "Surely," said he, "you are a veryignorant person if you can have such a thought as that. The Fairy Valleyis known to none of us of the royal household. Besides, you quite forgetabout the Dragon which guards the entrance to the Valley. Listen! Itseems to me I hear the Dragon's voice at this moment."

  They all stopped and listened, and, to be sure, they heard at thatmoment a low, hoarse, roaring sound come across the forest, soundingsomething like the bark of the sea-lion in the zoological gardens, sothat any who have heard that will know very well how the voice of aDragon sounds. For, as it seems, this is what Zuzu and Lulu heard.